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Well, Internet. He's back.

It's one day past June 16th (I'm writing this entry as if it's the night of June 17th, technically for me it is, Best Friend Rose slept over and I'm still awake. I'm not sure how. I'm exhausted, and it's already early morning. Hey, is that the sun coming up?!). My doomsday arrived.

Ricky Bobby is back. Officially.

All day on the 16th, I spent the day with Jazz. I tried very hard not to think about it, but you know me, Internet. I obsess and over analyze things, and when I try not to, it gets worse. I kept checking my Facebook homepage, and unfortunately, Ricky Bobby had a few status updates throughout the day. There was one about some concert he was going to, and then another that said, plain and simply, '(Insert the name of my state here).'

And unfortunately, since I thought about it so much, I might have brought up the topic of Rickybob to Jazz more than once. So many times, in fact, that Jazz began to look exasperated every time I would bring it up. I tried to be discreet and casual about it, but unfortunately, Jazz saw right through it.

I brought him up so many times, in fact, that I'm pretty sure Jazz has a suspicion that I like Ricky Bobby again. And not only does she think that, but Johnny thinks that too. UGH.

This frustrates me, because I don't.

NO, REALLY. I DON'T. It's just that...he impacted my life so much two years ago, how could I just forget about that? I'm aware that as of lately, my thinking about it may have become unhealthy, but how can I help it? I can't. I just can't.

"You need to stop thinking about him," Jazz kept telling me. I wasn't thinking about him. I was thinking about what could happen.

I don't think about him like that. I don't like him again, or still, or however you'd want to put it.

I don't. I can't. I won't.

xo Hopeless Romantic

Labels: ricky bobby, summer

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