♡ the life of a 25 year old hopeless romantic ♡

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"This song is talking to the person you haven't even met yet. Maybe they're rolling around in the hay with someone else, but they're not as good as you're gonna be. You just have to wait your turn. He's out there, she's out there. They're just learning what to contrast you against."






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Jazz Update.}
Thursday, July 28, 2011 | 4:01 PM | 0Comment

At my house. Right now. Spending the night for the first time since January.

Somewhat awkward so far. It feels weird, and I can't put my finger on why. It never used to be weird.
We're going to meet Best Friend Rose in a few hours to go to this outdoor movie thing. At first when I brought it up to Jazz, she didn't seem too keen on it...

I'll update again after this is all over. Oy.

xo Hopeless Romantic

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Summer Fun and Weddings}
Sunday, July 17, 2011 | 9:26 PM | 0Comment

Internet! It's been a while, hmm?

Since the last time I updated, I've been living my summer to the fullest as possible. (Well, the fullest for me, at least.) I've made it a point to try new things this summer, even if they were really small new things. Things that I've done so far include:

  • Going to a renaissance fair for the first time. Most. Amazing. Place. Ever. I even ate a giant turkey leg (who goes to one and doesn't eat a giant turkey leg?!) I'm going back again before summer ends, for sure.
  • Got feather extensions. At first I was worried about how they would look, but I love them! I want to get more put in soon.
  • Going to the park at least 3 times a week to read. No reason I can't seeing as I live right by one, it's just a short walk over. One of life's most looked over pleasures, I think.
  • Filled out and submitted a job application. My first ever. For Barnes & Noble, too! I didn't get a call back (and didn't expect one either, to be honest, considering I have no experience with work AT ALL) but I'm proud of myself for even gathering the guts to do it at all.
  • First responsibility as a legal adult: letting in a water heater inspector even though my parents weren't home at the time. He was kind of old, so I wasn't threatened or nervous. When I let him know I was 18 and it was okay for him to come in, he just looked at me skeptically like he didn't believe me (can't say I blame him, darn my height!) but in the end it was all fine. Hooray for adult responsibility! (I probably won't be saying that in 3 years.)
  • Started watching less TV. Our bills stacked up and we got the cable turned off for about 2 and a half weeks, and for the first time since I got a TV in my room when I was 11, I had to find stuff to do other than watching TV all the time. At first I got on this movie watching kick, but when I watched through every single one of my DVD's in 4 days flat I started finding other things to do. At first I thought it was torture, but then I realized how much time I waste in front of the television everyday. We have our cable turned on again, but that whole experience really made me want to stop taking privileges for granted. It's also made me want to accomplish other things during the day instead of just channel surfing and turning on the TV for background noise.
  • Started drinking more water. You know, the 8 glasses a day thing? That. Ever since I was a kid, I never really drank stuff often. Not for any particular reason, I just drank when I was really really thirsty, but never with meals, and whenever I'd start a drink it would take me forever to finish it. It wasn't a conscious thing, just a habit I guess. But I've worked on drinking water, water only, and tons of it. I sound like a commercial, I know, but I really have been feeling better lately. Not only does it make me feel refreshed, but my skin has been clearing up lately too. Water, people. That stuff is GOOD.
  • Started eating better in general. Not that I've been on a diet or anything, but I've just been eating healthier. More fruits, more yogurt, more vegetables. I've been eating salads at least 4 times a week, and I've been eating less ridiculous sized portions with everything else. It helps me feel healthier, and I feel more satisfied than when I just eat junk.
And aside from all those things, I've also taken a cold shower (broken water heater for two weeks, take it from me and never take an ice cold shower, it's much worse than it sounds.), made homemade ice cream in a plastic bag (which I hadn't done since elementary school!), read through 4 books, and watched through an entire Korean drama in 3 days (that's nothing new at all obviously, but I just thought I'd put that here too).

One other thing I've done this summer was go to an old classmate's wedding. She isn't in my grade, she graduated 2010. She's 19, and I went to her wedding.

Internet, I'm telling you. It was so surreal. I've known this girl since the summer after I was in the 5th grade. Pretty long. And I went to her wedding.

Her and her (now) husband have been together for 4 years. I'd always see them in the school hallways together, in fact, I can never remember them apart, ever.
Of course, as you can imagine, I was a bit skeptical when I first heard about the wedding. I mean, how many 19 year olds do you see getting married and having their marriage last?

But it wasn't until I saw her walk down the aisle in that wedding dress that it really hit me that she loved this man enough to want to spend the rest of her life with him.

Best Friend Rose and I cried like babies during that ceremony. I never cry at weddings, never. But hell, from the moment she walked out in her dress, we started crying.

There was one moment during that wedding, one image from the ceremony that will probably be imprinted in my memory for a very long time: after lighting a unity candle together, this woman was singing a beautiful song for them, and they just stood together by the candle, facing each other and holding hands; gazing at each other with this look of pure joy that immediately made me burst into a new round of tears. Because if I could ever claim to have ever witnessed what young love looks like, real pure young love, that was it. The sight of it raised goosebumps on my skin, and it's something that I hope I never ever forget.

It's crazy to think that I'm starting to get old enough now for people I know around my age starting to get married. Some are having kids too, but that's a whole other story.

Well, in other news, I'm over Drew. Completely.

Thank you guys for your comments and emails regarding everything, I really appreciated them, even though I didn't get to reply to all of them. I really was thisclose to confronting him about it, to asking him straight up, 'Look, did you like me or not? And if you did, why did you lose interest so fast?' But after thinking about it, I'd probably rather just look at what his actions told me instead.

Also, after getting impatient with him before, asking him any kind of serious question at all at this point would most likely scare him off for good (not that I'd really mind either way, considering we're not talking anymore, but I don't need him telling his friends about the psycho he almost liked/dated.) Plus, Drew doesn't seem to like confrontation very much. Wouldn't want him to pee his pants in fright, now would we?

(Yes we would.)

Anyhow, I've already moved on, and it doesn't bother me so much anymore. That was that, and it's over now. It feels good to bounce back from something like this so quickly. Maybe it was because I didn't quite like him just yet, even though I was sure I was starting to. Maybe resolution #8 wasn't so useless after all.

And as disappointing this whole deal turned out to be, I did learn from it. If anything, I can thank Drew for my first date, and for letting me remember what it's like to be excited about a boy again. I had begun to forget, it had been so long. Even if it didn't turn into anything, at least I had the experience at all.

I'm ready to accomplish more this summer, Internet. Are you ready for this?

xo Hopeless Romantic

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