♡ the life of a 25 year old hopeless romantic ♡

♡

Welcome \
♡


"This song is talking to the person you haven't even met yet. Maybe they're rolling around in the hay with someone else, but they're not as good as you're gonna be. You just have to wait your turn. He's out there, she's out there. They're just learning what to contrast you against."






Shout |
Questions? Concerns? Random observations?
Leave me a message here, or email me here. ♥



Credit ]
Full credit to the creator of this skin.

©Template make by Adila. Base code Zaty. Some code from Jaera.



refresh profile affies follow?♡

The concept of true friends.}
Tuesday, August 6, 2013 | 9:16 PM | 2Comment

Hey Internet!

So I've been wanting to write this entry ever since I wrote my last one, but to be totally honest, I wasn't completely sure how to go about it. Especially considering the nature of the last entry, to be frank I needed to mull things over in my mind after I wrote it. Writing all of that out was kind of like...finalizing things for me. Like writing it out helped me straighten out all of my thoughts about it and helped clear my mind. You know?

So anyway, after writing about that, it made a few other things even clearer to me. Going through this thing with Rose has really made me consider this thought: What are 'true friends'?

First off, let me start here: Twitter.

I've had my twitter account since...shoot. How long? Since...January 2009. Yep. Jan 2009. And it's weird because when I first made my account, I rarely ever tweeted. Ever. And then maybe after 4 months of having it, I just picked it up. And I've been addicted ever since.

For about a year, I used it like every other normal, everyday person uses Twitter. Tweet about TV, tweet about food, tweet about movies, etc etc. And then, some time after that first year, I found fandom. Refer here.

Tokio Hotel was really my first fandom on Twitter. Then, I'd started talking to other fans around my age, and also other other people my age in general. Especially considering I'd first started online school around then, being able to talk to other people my age during my boring workweeks was something that was really great for me. Even when I was unable to meet my friends from my old school and hang out with them, my friends on Twitter were always there. All I had to do was log in to talk to someone when I was lonely. I think I'll always appreciate that.

Then, at some point, I started taking it even more seriously. Refer here.And here. Okay, maybe that was even a bit too seriously. But, hey. I was a sixteen year old. He was a hot guy on the Internet. Can ya blame me, really? (But seriously, looking back on it, I only ever talked to him on Twitter. So really, for all I know, he could have been Catfishing me. Ah, to be young and naive.)

So, yes. I have a long standing history with Twitter. (If you can call 4 years long.)

But what's interesting is: the past 2 years, it's become and even bigger part of my life. During my junior and senior years especially, after finding out about k-pop around April 2010, I spent even more of my time on Twitter. Junior year of HS was intense, and my relationships with the kids that I'd gone to my old school with and begun to get even more distant.

As more and more people from my old school moved on, I began to move on too, and I started to turn more to the Internet for my social interaction.

I mean...when you think about it, it makes sense. There I was, a kid in online school with not a lot of friends--therefore I turned to the Internet for friends, just like I had school on the Internet. Not so ridiculous, right? It honestly makes sense.

And the more I took it seriously, the more I took measures to make sure the people I was talking to really were real people (not that it was a term back then, but basically, I wanted to make sure I wasn't being Catfished.) So I started adding these people on Facebook. And exchanging phone numbers. And by then, if I was totally positive that I could trust them, asking for addresses and sending cards and letters and getting them back.

So by then, they weren't just 'Twitter friends'. They were just...my friends. Long distance friends, maybe. Pen pals. But friends none the less.

And so going back to my previous entry for a second: After Rose had treated me that way on my birthday, it really put things into perspective for me. My other friends, my long distance friends that I talk to every single day, had made sure to tell me Happy Birthday. A few of them sent me cards in the mail. A few of them texted me right at midnight. A few of them posted on my Facebook wall. Some of them did all three. They did all of this without even having met me face to face, and without me even having to ask. They did it because they're my friends, and they knew it would make me happy.

Rose, who lives here, did none of that. Yes, she did go see a movie with me, but the day quickly turned into a date that I tagged along on. And she never texted me happy birthday, never called me, never posted a birthday message on my Wall, never even once TOLD me--TO MY FACE--Happy Birthday. Not once. And besides that day as an example, she talks to me maybe once a month--maybe twice if I'm lucky. This was the person I called my best friend.

This is why I was so upset by what Rose did. I think that maybe, after being treated that way by her for so long, I'd just gotten used to it over the years. But after seeing what kind of friends I could--and do--have, I realized that I deserve better.

I've never understood why people think that having online friends is weird. People have online (romantic) relationships all the time. (Even though I've definitely decided to avoid this for good now bc of reasons (coughcoughcoughDREWcoughcoughcough)) Also imo, online dating has lost most of its stigma that it had in the past and it's not even a weird thing now. So why is it so weird to some people that people make friends online too?

For introverted people like me, and especially people who were born in the modern age, it'd only make sense that a lot of our social interactions would be using technology. And meeting people this way is easier for me, because since I don't get out a lot (as sad as that is to admit, but I'm fully aware of it and accept it at this point lol) it's a good way for me to find people I can relate to. ESPECIALLY since where I live, my interests aren't very common interests, and it's hard to find people that I have stuff in common with.

But these girls...they've been there for me. Even though they're not physically there, they're there to talk when I need someone to talk to. When I'm upset, or just need to vent, they're there for me and I'm there for them too. When I need to laugh, they always make me laugh.

I've been hesitant to really talk about it here because I know how it sounds from the outside--it sounds weird. I know it does. And tons of people really honestly don't get the concept of people meeting friends and more online. But hey--look at all the questions I got about online high school. People thought that was weird too, and they didn't get it either, but it's okay.

We're friends. Even if we've never met before, it doesn't mean we're not real friends.

And I feel sorry for people that believe you can't make friends on the Internet, because even though there are some real assholes on the Internet, there are some wonderful, wonderful people--that live thousands of miles away--that I never would have known if it weren't for the Internet.

BUT. HERE'S THE THING. HERE'S THE BEST PART.

I get to meet some of them. At the end of this month. In California. Face to face.

Some of them I've only known for about a year or two...some of them I've talked to for years. YEARS. And I'm finally meeting them. Just a few weeks from now.

I'll go into detail about it in another entry because this is already getting long, and I don't want to leave anything out. But yes. It's happening.

Expect me to be blogging about this trip for a while, because it's a lot to wrap my mind around, and I need to collect my thoughts about it. But...yeah. Me. Hopeless Romantic. Sarah. Going out of state. Something I haven't done in 13 years.

And I'm going to finally--finally--hang out with friends.

Counting down the days.

xo Hopeless Romantic

Labels: , , , ,